Glow For Hope: Sparking Conversation on Mental Health
Rebecca Lazzelle: Functioning Is Not the Same as Being Okay
Corporate burnout, domestic violence, depression, suicidal thoughts, and rebuilding a life after everything falls apart
Host: Kelly Poelker
Guest: Rebecca Lazzelle
Topics: High-Functioning Mental Health Struggles · Domestic Violence · Trauma · Burnout · Depression · Suicide Prevention
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:11:13 — 97.8MB) | Embed
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A person can appear successful, dependable, and completely in control while privately carrying more than anyone around them realizes.
They can continue working, solving problems, caring for other people, and meeting every expectation while their mental health quietly deteriorates beneath the surface.
Rebecca Lazzelle understands that divide from lived experience.
A lifelong overachiever and former corporate process improvement director, Rebecca built much of her identity around achievement, responsibility, and being the person who could handle anything. At home, however, she was slowly losing herself in a relationship affected by mental health struggles, addiction, codependency, manipulation, and eventually domestic violence.
When the relationship ended, Rebecca continued trying to perform at work even as grief, trauma, panic attacks, depression, and suicidal thoughts overwhelmed her ability to function.
In this deeply honest conversation with host Kelly Poelker, Rebecca shares what happened when holding everything together was no longer possible—and what it took to begin finding herself again.
“I always knew it would get better. There was a light at the end of the tunnel—I just couldn’t see it.”
What You’ll Learn
- How achievement and perfectionism can become ways of coping with pain
- Why someone can continue functioning while their mental health quietly deteriorates
- How codependency and self-gaslighting can make unhealthy relationship patterns difficult to recognize
- What happened when Rebecca’s relationship escalated into domestic violence
- How grief, trauma, panic attacks, depression, and suicidal thoughts affected her ability to work
- Why Rebecca turned to FMLA when she could no longer work and care for herself at the same time
- The role therapy, EMDR, mindfulness, community, and other forms of support played in her journey
- Why progress after trauma is rarely straightforward or predictable
- How Rebecca began rebuilding her self-worth and learning to prioritize herself
- Why sharing the messy, unpolished parts of our stories can help someone else feel less alone
Guest Spotlight: Rebecca Lazzelle
Rebecca Lazzelle is a former corporate process improvement director turned published author, retreat host, and energy healing practitioner.
Her life and work have been shaped by personal experiences with corporate burnout, grief, codependency, addiction within a relationship, domestic violence, depression, trauma, and suicidal ideation.
Rebecca is the author of the memoir What the F*** Was That? and the year-long mindfulness journal You Can F***ing Do This!. Through her writing, online content, retreats, and other work, she shares an honest view of what it can look like to appear highly functional while privately feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and close to unraveling.
Rebecca emphasizes that she is sharing her lived experience—not offering clinical advice. Her goal is to help others recognize that their experiences are valid and that they are not as alone as they may feel.
Powerful Moments From the Conversation
“I always knew it would get better. There was a light at the end of the tunnel—I just couldn’t see it.”
“My system was so overloaded that any little thing that didn’t go well, I couldn’t handle anymore.”
“If I don’t prioritize myself, no one is going to do it.”
“I actually didn’t deserve the unkindness.”
“I was not alone physically and had never felt more alone in my entire life.”
“Whatever you have experienced, it’s valid. You might feel alone, but there are people who have had a similar experience.”
Connect With Rebecca Lazzelle
Learn more about Rebecca’s memoir, mindfulness journal, retreats, writing, and other work:
- Website: RebeccaLazzelle.com
- Instagram: @RebeccaLazzelle
- YouTube: Rebecca Lazzelle
- Memoir: What the F*** Was That?
- Mindfulness Journal: You Can F***ing Do This!
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
-
Family and Medical Leave Act and mental health:
Learn how eligible employees may be able to use FMLA leave for qualifying mental health conditions through the U.S. Department of Labor . -
National Domestic Violence Hotline:
Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), text START to 88788, or visit TheHotline.org . -
Glow For Hope Mental Health Resources:
Visit Glow For Hope’s Find Help page for additional mental health and crisis support.
A note about treatments and supplements: Rebecca discusses approaches that were part of her personal experience. Individual results and risks vary. Do not begin, stop, or change medication, supplements, or mental health treatment based on this episode. Speak with a qualified healthcare professional about what is appropriate for you.
Continue the Conversation
More Conversations About Burnout, Trauma, Identity, and Asking for Help
Rebecca Lazzelle’s story reminds us that someone can continue meeting every expectation while privately struggling to hold themselves together. If this episode resonated with you, continue the conversation with these Glow For Hope episodes about burnout, trauma, identity, self-worth, and recognizing when it is time to ask for support.
▶ Michael D. Levitt: Boundaries, Burnout & Being Your Best
Burnout survivor Michael D. Levitt shares how blurred boundaries and the pressure to keep performing can quietly take over—and what it takes to begin protecting your time, energy, and mental health.
Listen to Michael D. Levitt →▶ Dr. Colleen Saringer: Workplace Mental Health, Suicide Prevention, and How Work Can Hurt People
Dr. Colleen Saringer explores how workplace conditions can quietly affect a person’s mental health, why psychosocial risks deserve greater attention, and what organizations can do before employees reach a breaking point.
Listen to Dr. Colleen Saringer →▶ Maliha Khan: Identity, Belonging & Finding Your Voice
Maliha Khan opens up about the expectations that taught her to shrink, the emotional cost of losing touch with herself, and what it took to begin trusting her voice and showing up as her full self.
Listen to Maliha Khan →▶ Richard Lynch: When the Helper Becomes the One Who Needs Help
Richard Lynch shares how becoming the person everyone depended on led him to abandon himself—and why professional knowledge, outward capability, and a lifetime of helping others do not make anyone immune to trauma, depression, or the need for support.
Listen to Richard Lynch →Support the Show
Glow For Hope is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit dedicated to making conversations about mental health more approachable and helping people feel less alone.
If this episode helped you better understand what someone may be carrying beneath the surface, please share it. One honest conversation can remind someone that they do not have to keep holding everything together alone.
Help Is Available
You do not have to wait until you reach a breaking point before asking for support. You also do not need to have the perfect words.
Call or text 988 in the United States to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
You can also chat with a crisis counselor at 988Lifeline.org .
For domestic violence support, call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), text START to 88788, or visit TheHotline.org .
If you are in immediate danger or experiencing a life-threatening emergency, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.
Content notice: This episode includes discussion of domestic violence, relationship abuse, depression, trauma, suicidal thoughts, and methods contemplated during a suicidal crisis. Please listen with care.
Disclaimer: This podcast is provided for informational, educational, and awareness purposes only. Rebecca Lazzelle shares her personal lived experience and is not presenting herself as a licensed mental health professional. The conversation is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, treatment, counseling, legal advice, or crisis intervention. Always seek guidance from qualified professionals regarding your health, safety, medications, supplements, or treatment options.

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